Originally published in ‘zine issue #38, 2007
Asgard Dreamslave
(Devil Doll)
It’s always kind of a bummer when you get exactly what you expect. This is some seriously fruity black/power/keyboard metal. I bet Europeans go bananas over this shit, but it just makes my balls shrivel up into little raisins. I mean, I like Iron Maiden as much as the next guy, but I don’t get this shit at all. Boo.
(by J.R. Hayes) ■
Beecher 2006 album + This Elegy, His Autopsy
(Earache)
Throttling U.K. metalcore with a pleasing and not-too-obtrusive tech-edge that’s played strong and free of American toughguy breakdowns. There’s a good mix of tempos, from plodding to blasting—not to mention noise collage segues, and nice instrumental digressions (most notably on the newer disc) suggesting aural spaciousness to contrast the prevailing condensed sound. Male screams abound, and some passable clean vocals come and go. Oh yeah, there were no lyrics provided so I’ll be a jerk and put forth that they sing about getting blow jobs on tour and what constitutes the proper fit of trouser.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Boris Pink
(Southern Lord)
I confess: I am a Boris freak, and I have been for many years, so this review is going to be biased as hell. Some of their albums are very thematic, some of their albums are just one long, brilliant song; this is one of their “mixed bag” albums where they do it all. They woo you with beautiful feedback, rock you with searing guitar work, and pound you into dust with their monstrous rhythms. It’s a virtuoso performance all the way. If you haven’t experienced Boris before, this is as good as a place to start as any.
(by J.R. Hayes) ■
Chrome Helmet Full Circle
(Sin Klub Entertainment)
Chrome Helmet is a mid-Western hard rock band with a few tasty hooks. This full-length album benefits from excellent production values and solid performances from all members. If you dig the up-tempo contemporary rock music you hear on mainstream radio, but want something new that’s not in heavy rotation, then you might want to look into this group. Some tracks stand above others when subjected to my expertly calibrated catchiness detector, but I have to admit, this, while good and certainly not bad, is not music that makes my jaded bowels erupt in a torrent of pure elation. A pity, that.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Clown Alley Circus of Chaos
(Southern Lord)
Seeing a name like Clown Alley, I was expecting some frizzed-out early ‘90s groove metal with a grunge-induced identity crisis, probably from somewhere around Waldorf. Instead, I got fucking awesome late-‘80s thrash metal from former Melvins Mark Deutrom and Lori Black! I really liked this record. The songs are cool, mostly straightforward with good riffs and sporadic shifts in direction that add some variety. According to legend, this rarefied material could only be heard from the original demo tapes. Now it’s been compiled and burned to compact disc, so notice served to all you thrashers, Melvins fans, and compulsive hoarders of anything even remotely associated with Shirley Temple Black—Richard, I’m speaking to you here.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Dawn Of Azazel Sedition
(Ibex Moon)
Burly, tight, chaotic death metal blasting your face—it must be Dawn Of Azazel from New Zealand! This group reminds me of Angel Corpse, but without all the early Morbid Angel guitar solos racing into your eyes and a wee bit less acidity in the vocal attack. They’ve got some good churning stuff on this, their second full-length album. It certainly won’t disappoint the death metal lover on your Christmas list.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Ewigkeit Conspiritus
(Earache)
After a paranoid Englishman’s rant sets the mood, the urge for the techno rock starts to push hard and—bam—just like that I’m on the dance floor rocking a plastic jumpsuit. God, this chorus is so melodramatic. I can’t tell if this is a really, really processed drummer or a drum machine. I like the distorted guitar sound, though, kind of Orangey and grainy. Next song hits and I like the thick Hammond organ sound in the intro. The male vocals are well-performed and consistency and variety—at times you’ll hear things like Celtic fiddle and references to Sting, Pink Floyd, and Sabbath channeled through Ewigkeit’s filter. So, if you want some highly produced, conceptual U.K. rock with a preponderance of soaring techno keyboards that doesn’t sound anything like Muse, well then, here you are.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Landmine Marathon Wounded
(Level Plane)
Heavy fuckin’ intro—yes! Now a fucking single-foot blast! Total death metal violence with a big nod to the mature U.K. war metal style from some up-and-coming Arizonans. I’m feeling chuffed and stoked at the same time when I hear the chunky grooves, harmonized fifths, and unabashed Bolt Throwerisms that characterize a lot of the riffs. The harsh, raspy screams and roaring multiple vocal assault gives this band that special touch of powerviolence much appreciated at your local inner-city crust house. Good stuff here!
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Rosetta The Galilean Satellites
(Translation Loss)
This is a double CD of pretty epic atmospheric hardcore, the obvious touchstones being Isis, Cult Of Luna, and newer Neurosis, with heavy, Coalesce-type vocals. It’s quality music for sure, but not heavy enough for my tastes. Disc two seems to be more ambient/experimental, and it’s also good, but I don’t hear anything that sets Rosetta apart from the aforementioned bands. However, if you really dig this style, then you might want to check these guys out, ‘cause they’re not just a bunch of chumps.
(by J.R. Hayes) ■
Sewage Sammich One Man’s Sewage is Another Man’s Sammich!
(3XM Productions)
If you’re like me, sometimes you see a band’s logo or album art and you’re instantly sold, or at least momentarily fixated. In the past, I’ve bought albums like Realm of Chaos, Into Darkness, and Storm of the Lights Bane inspired by nothing more than pure aesthetic fascination. And happily, with each of those came potent music to exceed the visuals. Of course I’ve unwittingly picked some real shitters over the years, too.
When I spied Sewage Sammich’s awesome “sub sandwich” logo, I was as sure as I’ve been in years that this was a record with real promise. The colorful Garbage Pail Kids-meet-goregrind treatment from artist Lou Rusconi instantly transported me back to a time in my memories when album art felt more significant, and a new record could change the way you think and feel. I couldn’t wait to get this disc in the player in the vague hope that they would codify their artwork through fun and thought-provoking grind or thrash songs about mass-produced sandwiches. Yet after listening to the disc, I felt reminded that too much of today’s metal stinks like rotten garbage dumped on a barge and shipped off to anywhere someone stupid wants to take it. Much of this whimsical record seems intended to be funny, but I didn’t laugh once, and I’m a fun guy, really. It’s too bad the drum machine, stale noodles, and cheap digital production guarantee this project lives up to its credo. Check it out if you yearn for a return to the days of middle school lunch table banter, or think you’d enjoy a painfully dumb blend of Agoraphobic Nosebleed, Gigantic Brain, Anal Cunt, Ministry, and Sore Throat.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
Urgehal Goatcraft Torment
(Agonia/Southern Lord)
“This is satanic black metal,” croons Urgehal’s frontman just before a hail of speed-picked arpeggios descends upon your flesh like unholy rabid bats. Really, that’s all you need to know about this record. The real story about a black metal band comes out in the blood and fury (or laughable puniness) of their live show, and I have not had the opportunity to witness the savagery of the beast of Norway that is Urgehal.
(by Lenny Likas) ■
